When the Body Says NO: How Stress and Repressed Emotions Affect Our Health
Our body is an amazing mechanism that carries the traces of everything we experience – from joyful moments to the tough periods of stress and repressed emotions. Canadian physician and psychologist Gabor Maté, in his book When the Body Says No, explores the connection between chronic stress, emotional trauma, and the development of serious illnesses. Through his research and real-life examples from his clinical practice, he reveals how unresolved emotional conflicts can lead to autoimmune diseases, cancer, cardiovascular problems, and other serious conditions.
How Repressed Emotions Affect Health
Gabor Maté, a specialist with years of experience in psychosomatic medicine, claims that many chronic illnesses have their roots in repressed emotions. He examines cases of patients suffering from cancer, multiple sclerosis, and rheumatoid arthritis and discovers that these people often sacrificed their own needs to meet the expectations of others. According to him, many people develop illnesses because they are unable to set boundaries. They try to please others, ignore their own needs, and repress their emotions. This behavioral pattern often starts in childhood, when children learn to suppress their feelings to gain approval.
Factors Contributing to This Process:
The “Good Child” Syndrome – Children raised in an environment where they must be “good” and not show anger or sadness often grow up to be adults who care for everyone except themselves. This makes them prone to chronic stress and illnesses.
Chronic Stress – When a person is under prolonged stress, their body produces high levels of cortisol and adrenaline, which deplete the immune system and increase the risk of inflammatory processes.
Autoimmune Diseases and Cancer – In his book, Maté analyzes numerous cases of patients suffering from cancer and autoimmune diseases and finds that they are often people who repress their own needs and emotions for the sake of others.
Scientific Evidence on the Link Between Emotions and Health
Numerous scientific studies support Gabor Maté’s claims about the psychosomatic effects emotions have on physical health. According to these studies, emotional states play a key role in the development of various diseases, increasing the risk of chronic conditions and damaging the body in the long term. Here are some significant studies and their results:
Harvard University Study: Emotional Suppression and Heart Disease
A Harvard University study shows that people who regularly suppress their emotions and do not express their feelings have a 3 times higher risk of developing heart disease. The study reveals that people who tend to ignore or hide their emotions experience chronic stress, which increases inflammation in the body and leads to problems with blood vessels and the heart. Emotional suppression is linked to elevated cortisol levels, the stress hormone, which can damage the cardiovascular system.
Studies from Harvard and Toronto Universities
Research from Harvard and Toronto Universities shows that repressing emotions has serious consequences for both the brain and physical health. Chronic stress and emotional pain can change the brain structures responsible for emotional regulation, impairing the brain’s ability to cope with stress and increasing the risk of depression and anxiety. Specifically, repressed emotions can damage the hippocampus – the area responsible for memory and emotional stability. At the same time, people who regularly express their feelings, whether anger, sadness, or joy, experience less stress, have better mental health, and lower risks of cardiovascular disease. This underscores the importance of emotional openness not just for mental but also for physical well-being.
Cancer Therapy and Emotional Expression
An interesting study investigating the effects of psychological therapy in cancer patients shows that patients who undergo psychological therapy and learn to express their emotions have significantly better treatment outcomes. Therapy helps patients cope with stress, anxiety, and depression that often accompany a cancer diagnosis. As a result, they are better able to deal with the disease and improve their quality of life. This study supports the idea that emotional well-being is just as important for recovery as medical treatment.
University of California Study
Another study from the University of California shows that people who regularly practice self-compassion and actively express their emotions have a stronger immune system and lower levels of inflammation in the body. The study indicates that people who are more compassionate toward themselves and do not suppress their emotions have a significantly lower risk of developing chronic diseases, such as diabetes, heart disease, and autoimmune disorders. Through active emotional expression and the practice of self-compassion, these individuals can reduce stress and strengthen their bodies, thereby supporting their overall health.
All of these studies demonstrate that emotional regulation and the ability to express emotions are not only important for mental health but also for physical health. Suppressing emotions and failing to recognize internal feelings lead to serious health problems.
How to Recognize That the Body Says NO
Maté emphasizes that the body often sends signals of excessive stress, but we ignore them until it is too late. Here are some warning signs:
- Chronic fatigue and lack of energy
- Frequent headaches or migraines
- Digestive problems, such as irritable bowel syndrome
- Feelings of anxiety and depression
- Frequent illness due to a weakened immune system
How to Take Care of Our Mental and Physical Health
5 Key Lessons from Gabor Maté for Emotional and Physical Health
Gabor Maté highlights the deep connection between mental and physical health, pointing out that stress, repressed emotions, and lack of boundaries can lead to serious illnesses. Here are some of his most valuable tips for a better life:
Key Messages We Need to Embrace:
The Body and Mind Are Inseparably Connected – Emotional experiences directly impact our health. Repressed feelings and chronic stress can lead to serious diseases.
Setting Boundaries is Crucial – We must learn to say “no” without feeling guilty. If you often agree to others’ requests, even when you don’t want to, it can lead to accumulated stress and exhaustion. The ability to set boundaries is key to your well-being. Constantly pleasing others and ignoring your own needs is a sure path to burnout and health problems.
Repressed Emotions Manifest as Physical Symptoms – Repressed emotions do not disappear; they accumulate and can manifest as physical or psychological issues. If we do not express our anger, sadness, or fear, our body will find a way to show them – through pain, chronic fatigue, or other illnesses.
Self-Compassion and Love Are the Keys to Healing – Instead of constantly criticizing ourselves, we must learn to treat our own emotions and needs with love and understanding. This means accepting ourselves with all our weaknesses and vulnerabilities, without judgment, and trying to understand what lies behind our emotions and how we can take better care of ourselves.
Working with a Psychologist Can Help – Sessions with a professional can help us recognize hidden behavioral patterns that harm our health and build new, healthier habits. These sessions can provide the necessary tools to free ourselves from long-standing emotional burdens and create lasting and healthy changes in our lifestyle.
Applying these lessons and messages in daily life can help reduce stress, improve emotional health, and live a more fulfilling life.
When the Mind is Silent, the Body Speaks
These messages are not just theory, but practical steps that can improve both our mental and physical well-being. It is important to start listening to our bodies before it is forced to send us painful signals. The idea that “when the mind is silent, the body speaks” emphasizes the inseparable connection between mental and physical health. The mind is our inner world, where emotions, thoughts, and experiences are stored. When these emotions and thoughts are not expressed or processed, they do not disappear – they accumulate and find ways to manifest, often in the body.
The body is like an extremely sensitive sensor that perceives all our emotional and psychological states, even when we are not aware of them or do not express them. When we are under stress, anger, sadness, or fear, but cannot or do not want to express them openly, these feelings remain inside us, creating inner tension. This tension can turn into physical symptoms, such as headaches, back pain, digestive problems, muscle aches, or chronic fatigue.
Our body does not know how to silence emotions. It cannot block unexpressed feelings, so it begins to speak in its own way – through pain or discomfort. For example, someone who has suppressed their anger for years may start experiencing chronic pain in their neck or shoulders. This may be a sign that they have not resolved the inner conflict and have not allowed their emotions to come out.
The body often sends us signals when we do not pay attention to our mental state. Stress, for example, can lead to physical exhaustion or a weakened immune system, making the body more susceptible to diseases. Ignoring these signals or neglecting the need for emotional expression can lead to chronic illnesses, autoimmune disorders, or even cancer.
That is why it is important to learn to listen to both our minds and bodies. When we learn to express our emotions healthily, take care of our mental well-being, and pay attention to the signals our body sends, we can prevent the pain and suffering that arise from unexpressed and unconscious feelings. The key message is clear – the body never lies. When we neglect our emotions, the body finds a way to signal us, often through pain, tension, or other physical symptoms. These signals are the way our body tries to remind us that something is out of balance, and it is time to pay attention to our inner world. Ignoring these signals can lead to serious health problems in the future.
Caring for mental health is not only a matter of emotional well-being but is also essential for physical health. Stress, repressed emotions, and unresolved internal conflicts can negatively affect the immune system, lead to chronic diseases, and heighten feelings of physical exhaustion. When the mind is in disharmony, the body will do its best to remind us through various symptoms.
If you feel that stress and accumulated emotions are starting to affect your physical state, it is not shameful to seek help from a specialist. Psychological counseling can be the first step toward recognizing the root causes of the issues and finding healthier and more balanced ways of coping. Processing emotions, setting boundaries, and learning to care for yourself are key to restoring inner peace and overall health.